Friends With Shadows
by kate438
Summary: Eric deals with depression in a tragic way [no longer a stand-alone fic, sequel "Letting Go" posted!]


**Friends With Shadows **

Author note: I usually write ER fan fiction, but I've been watching That 70's Show for a long time and I've grown to love it! So this is just a short fic, due to my over active imagination, Enjoy! Reposting this story and the reviews because I re-read it and the spacing was terrible and really hard to read. I hope that it's easier to read and understand  now.

~*~*~*~*~

 I sat alone in my basement. For once my friends were nowhere to be seen, something that I was extremely thankful for at the moment. I mean, my friends are awesome but it was just getting tiresome to have to pretend that everything was all right around them. I sat back against the cushions of the worn out sofa, turning my head slightly to the left to catch the time; 10.27. I smiled to myself. Kitty and Red were already asleep so I would remain undisturbed. I listened a moment for sounds, footsteps, voices, the TV. When I was rewarded with silence, I reached under the couch for the paper bag I had put there earlier and quietly dumped the contents of it onto the make shift table in front of me. I stared at the two vials and syringe that lay there, recalling the man's words as I had bought them.  
  
"This stuff will make you forget everything...trust me, you want this, kid." I hoped he was right. Forgetting everything was exactly what I wanted to do, it was something I'd have paid any price for. It's a bit confusing, lately; nothing matters to me anymore, like something is always missing. I removed my belt, looped it around my arm and tightened it. I picked up the syringe, inserting it into one of the vials, then pulling the plunger back just like the man had shown me. I watched the clear liquid fill the syringe with an almost silent swishing sound. I put the vial down, took a shaky breath and inserted the needle into my vein. I flinched; it had stung a bit more than I had expected. There was no turning back now. I pushed the plunger down, watching the liquid disappear into my arm. I gasped a bit. It was like fire spreading through my arm but it subsided a moment later, the burning replaced by an incredible rush. I felt light, like I was flying. I felt free.  
  
  


*****

I don't know how long I sat there but it must have been a long time because I could hear Kitty and Red upstairs talking and moving around. I put everything back into the bag and put it back under the couch. I would find a better hiding place for it later. I strained to hear what was being said above me. I heard Kitty speak. 

"I'm worried about Eric, Red. He doesn't eat, he doesn't sleep..." I heard Red's voice cut her off.

 "He's a teenager, Kitty, that's what they do."

 "No, I think something's wrong." 

Note to self...act happier around Red and Kitty. The voices became indistinct so I decided I had better get upstairs and make an appearance. I stood up and immediately regretted it. I felt the room spinning and I felt sick to my stomach. I figured by body just wasn't used to the strong effects of the heroin. The next thing I knew I was falling. There was a loud crash as I took out the table with me as I fell.

 "Damn it" I mumbled, as I heard two pairs of footsteps on the stairs. 

"Eric, is that you?" Kitty's voice rang out. 

"Yeah" I said as I sat up slowly, rubbing my head where I had hit it against the concrete floor, then leaned against the couch for support. Red walked over to me, righted the overturned table, speaking as he did so. 

"What the hell happened?"

 "I fell asleep down here. When I woke up I tripped." I lied, hoping they wouldn't notice. Red just nodded, offering me a hand, which I gratefully accepted. Once in a vertical position, I tried walking again but to no avail. Everything before my eyes swirled, as I heard Red's distorted voice saying my name. Then everything went black.  
  


*****  
  


When I woke up, I was confused. I was laying on the couch in the living room. I felt a lot better, the throbbing in my head gone, along with the dizziness. I watched my mother walk into the room, a worried look on her face. 

"Good, you're up. How are you feeling?"

 "Better, much better." I said. Kitty sighed. 

"Well, I'm glad to hear that. You must have the flu or something." I didn't argue it, even though it was the summer and I knew the real reason why I had passed out like that. I just leaned back into the cushions.

 "What time is it?" I asked.

 "Almost three in the afternoon." 

I sat up. Almost three? The rest of the guys were probably in the basement and if they found the bag. I didn't want to think about it. I flung my legs over the side of the couch and stood up, thankful that I wasn't feeling sick. 

"What are you doing?" Kitty questioned. "I think you should lie back down. You..."

 "I'm fine, Mom." I told her, making my way to the basement. "I'm fine." she stood still, kind of wringing her hands. 

"Well...ok" I smiled at her then went downstairs to the basement. I felt somewhat relieve when I saw that only Hyde was there. He was sitting in his usual spot, watching TV. He turned to face me when he heard my footsteps.

 "Hey, Foreman."

 "Hey, Hyde. Where's everyone else?"

 "They heard you were sick, so they left. It was kind of cool, actually. It was like you were really fast acting bug repellent." 

I laughed. Leave it to Hyde to make a remark like that. I sat down on the couch noticing that Hyde was staring at me.

 "What?" 

"You look like shit. I guess Kitty wasn't just being all maternal when she said you were sick." I sighed. If Hyde noticed how crappy I looked, then it must be really apparent. 

"I'm fine," I told him. He just gave me a look that seemed to say whatever. What I really wanted to say was, get the hell out of the basement so I can hide my heroin in a better place. I know that I can't let anybody find out about this, even Hyde, especially Hyde. They wouldn't understand how badly I needed it to escape from my mental hell. Wait, what the hell am I thinking here? I sound like a nutcase. Well, I guess I am. I don't know, I just feel very discontented with everything and everyone. My friends annoy me, save for Hyde, even Donna, which is so weird since she's my best friend and I've known her for almost my entire life. I am guessing that is why I am so eager for this heroin to be my release. I need it or I'm afraid I'll go insane. I must have spaced out because I heard Hyde saying my name and waving his hand in front of my face.

 "Hey, Foreman....Eric..." I shook my head, focusing.

 "Yeah?" Hyde raised an eyebrow at me. 

"You were spacing out and looking pretty weird" I shrugged my shoulders, hoping that Hyde wouldn't say anything more and he didn't. We just sat watching TV, wordlessly.  
  
*****

_One Month Later_... 11:57pm. 

It seems as though the only time I can truly be alone is at night. I removed my bag from its new hiding place behind the dryer. I figured it was safer there than under the couch. I don't think anyone has figured me out yet. I still get concerned looks but I have become better at steering clear of the truth. The syringe is in my hand, almost filled with twice the amount than when I had started. I need it to get the same body numbing high which is becoming more difficult to get. I expertly insert the needle, pushing its contents into my veins. I welcome the feeling of lightheadedness and the sensation of flying. I roll my shirtsleeve down over my bony arm. Everything hangs off of me now. I play with the idea of filling the syringe up again, curious as to what would happen. Would it end my life? I'm not sure that is something I want. I try to imagine it sometimes. What people would say, how they would react. It's sinister, morbid, even. I'd imagine my mother would cry, my father would be more angry than upset and I'm not sure how Hyde and everyone else would react. I can feel myself coming down from the high, angry that it didn't last as long as I'd hoped it would. I refill the syringe, more that I had ever done before and am perfectly still as I insert it into my arm. I pause a moment, contemplating. Before I realize what I'm doing, I've already pushed the plunger down. The syringe falls to the floor, shattering. There is a loud ringing in my ears and the room spins. My heart is pounding so hard, I'm afraid it will explode. My chest and throat tightens in paralyzing pain. It's then I realize how crazy this al is. I try to scream, yell, anything but I am not sure if I am making any sound. I just sit and pray that someone will find me. It seems a moment later, Kitty, Red and Hyde are coming down the stairs. I watch as Kitty brings a hand to her mouth, a cry escaping her lips. Red glances at the vials and broken syringe. For the first time in his life, my Father look's scared. I look at Hyde, the anguish clearly written across his features and I want to tell him sorry I am. I'm sorry I did this. I thought I could control it. I'm shaking now and it's getting harder to breathe. Kitty walks up to me, kissing me on the forehead. Her lips feel like ice against my burning skin. I know that there's nothing they can do and that I am going to die. Everything swirls into darkness and then all is silent. 

_*It's not a habit, it's cool. I feel alive.  
  
if you don't have it you're on the  
  
other side. I'm not an addict.  
  
Maybe, that's a lie*  
_  
The End  
  
I hope you guys enjoyed the story! The song I used was "Not An Addict" by K's Choice.


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